I shall not weep...

coz i will focus on the good in life...

i had a brilliant night... post finding out about.. what'd u call him noor?? oh yeah... post CL phase of the night was truly awesome.

I went for midnight mass!!! at St. James'.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'd wanted to go for sooo long.. but then midnight isnt a time that i'm allowed to go out of the houuse... were it not for work.. and the freak fact that i was actually listening to other ppl in the office car instead of being kllost in the telephone..

it was beautiful.... i remember goin to the Sacred heart cathederal last christmas in the afternoon with everyone from ppg... n we all wondered how it would be like if we were actually present on occasion...

n this time i got it...

the silence, the candles, the smoke from the incense.. the sound of a hundred whispered responses...

it was peace as i have never known... except after a large mouthful of bhang on holi.. or in the crush of the jostling crowds at bihariji temple at vrindavan.... thousands of people cahanting together... lost in something they only half understand...

maybe religion isnt really that bad after all... its when you try and push your sensibility on others when the problem rises..

last night the pastor's message was simply this... do not be afraid.. love everyone around you..

and god will protect you



my tears dropped on the altar railing when i knelt to be blessed...