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Anticipation sent a shiver trough my body as another red circle joined the others around my wrist… they now went halfway up my arm.. The dark red in sharp contrast with the white… the red sparkled.. the white subdued..


how many over the ages had looked down to this sight and known that life as they knew it was gone???

I could hear what seemed like a hundred voices outside my closed door… talking, laughing... celebrating… I still wasn’t sure if it was happiness or sadness that enveloped me… the anticipation was turning into something sharp… I couldn’t identify if it was pain or pleasure…

I hoped no one would come inside.. but then maybe someone would…. I didn't think I was ready to face the exclamations, the advice, the comments.. but the attention might be nice…

I took another look through the mirror at the room behind me.. awash in colour, clothes and knickknacks.. I wanted to remember this.. keep it safe in my memory no matter where I went next…

The mirror showed a girl who looked nervous and scared.. quite unlike the confident woman I had wanted desperately to be..

I looked down at my arm again… the glittering circles seemed to shimmer brighter in the tear- induced haze.. seemed to grow bigger… I sighed and closed my eyes.. leaned back in my chair and positioned my arm carefully over the box by my side..

listening to the distant drumbeat of the dripping drops..

I hope it fills up neatly and doesn’t spill over… don’t want anyone to have to clean up too many bloodstains…