my painting

It’s the most magical place you would ever see.. full of books and flowers and mirrors and light.. of stories of beautiful princesses and their handsome princes and happily ever afters.. its got pictures of puppies and babies and all the pretty things you can imagine… its even got a beautiful wall made of glass.. a wall size mirror before which I preen and pretend to be the queen of my world..

It is my kingdom…

and its besieged by monsters…

it is the mirror behind which they  sit.. watching me, watching everything I do, I can never see the but I know they’re there.. talking among themselves but never talking to me..

 oh they think they're being nice to me..

they send me food and clothes and new clothes and other pretty things,

they don’t think I know where I am…

but I do

I remember all of it.. from before

I remember the knife that I twisted and watched the colour spread slowly across his body.. and then the floor

I remember the little fountain that burst out when I took it out from his chest

I remember being fascinated by the glistening red

and the way it felt on my fingers when I started to paint

I painted the walls with flowers and clouds and a heart

it was the most perfect heart ever.. perfect and red and gleaming

it was my most beautiful painting

but then I had to come live in this room

it has everything I could ever ask for

but the only people I ever see are the ones that aren’t really there

they never speak to me

they don’t touch me

and that’s when I want to run away from the mirrored room and hide

I hate them..

they don’t let me paint….