Saturday, December 26, 2009

randomness...

there's news on the blogosphere..Indyeah is now engaged!!! the first blog- friend i made.. even though we havent really stayed in touch.. Congrats Indyeah!
ansh came to delhi for a few hours on 24th... thanks to the gods of connecting flights.. we met after bout 3 years but considering we talk atleast once a week it was as if he was never really gone.. missed you bro.... wish we could've hung out for longer...
upshot of the little reunion... max n i hung out for quite a while.. both on the school reunion and on 24th... it was fun... i'd forgotten how random our conversations in school really were..

speaking of school, the reunion was on 20th.. sweets, max, sasthi n i took a walk around the school, and it suddenly seemed a lot smaller than we remembered... and they've cut down half the trees that ringed the grounds and put railings where none were and bricked up teh back of the stage... oh and they've also changed the basketball court... though sweets said they had done it last year and i just didnt notice at the last reunion...
this reunion was a tad more boring than last year though... a lot of ppl who came last year didn't this year.. the post lunch drinks at sec 18 were not much fun for that reason... then we got into a discussion about drugs and what ppl are doing and how innocent we were at 16...
oh and MODI is engaged too!! first one in our batch as far as we know... certainly teh first among our friends.. made for a whole week of facebook comments when he announced it.. via fb status update ofcourse...

Four days left of 2009.. holidays are on so i'm pretty much spending the day sleeping in the sun and reading mills n boon romances... i'm SO addicted to them...

i feel like a lazy cat stretching in the sun... meow...

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

to friends and awkward questions..

"so.. why are you still single?"

i THINK it was meant as a random question.. possibly even a flattering one.. but somehow it hurt something inside... is it really so bad to be single?? i mean.. its been a while since i've been single but why is it so weird that i've kept the status??? i guess its flattering if ppl wonder why a "girl like me" is still single.. atleast i think they mean to be.. but why is it so necessary?? whats wrong with NOT wanting any entanglement?

recently, at a friend's birthday party N practically dragged me over to talk to some guy who apparently told her that he thought i was nice.. introduced us and then left me alone with him... that was embarrassing enough but to make it worse she gave me quite a talking to coz i didnt talk to the aforementioned guy for more than 5 minutes before escaping back to other friends.. n she was like.. how r u going to get over your past if u freeze out every guy who'se interested??

my question is... WHAT is so wrong with being single??
should i HAVE to hook up with the next guy who comes along???
why is single automatically linked to lonely?
why do people assume that my decision to keep this status means i'm not over my past?

no freakin way....

someone told me this line years ago... "the easiest way to get over someone is to get under someone else.."

I've never agreed with it..
and i dont want to have to prove my happiness by hooking up with any guy just so my friends stop worrying bout my sanity...
i'm fine ppl..
its not like my life and my happiness depends on having a boyfriend..

n thank you.. i love you for all the worrying you do about me..

Saturday, December 19, 2009

and i sleep...

its that time of the day again.. when the night has begun to spread its dark cloak over everything.. birds create a din overhead.. trees in the distance slowly turn grey- black from green...
twilight.. the saddest time of the day... the dying sun leaves the sky a bloody orange... the far horizon already swathed in shades of purple and grey..

the glow of the computer screen creates a shimmery light in the gathering darkness.. it loomes around me.. waiting for the little square of light to give up and let the dark claim me..

the sheets of paper between me and the screen begin to blur in the gathering gloom... i peer at them ineffectually... the pencil strokes on them seem to be dissolving into the night... as if mocking my efforts..

i sigh as my eyelids begin to descend on their own.. i try to blink but my lashes don't want to let go.. the light from the screen creates a red glow inside my eyes... urging me to open them... its waiting for me...
they're all waiting for me... the fading pencil strokes, the waiting cursor, the white screen punctuated with black typescript..

i feel myself fading as their pull fails to draw me back into the light.. i sigh again.. my lashes cling tighter to each other... my arms come up to cradle my head..

and i sleep.......

Friday, December 18, 2009

parties and shoots.. :)

i had the most marvellous coupla days.. wish i could put up pictures but can't coz i'm using the college computers.. home comp's effed up as usual... so here goes...

16th was a friend's birthday party... got all dressed up at N's place with another friend showing me how i had been trumped from the position of the most hyper person around.. she was so much more hyper bout her dress than i have ever been .. and i'm quoting N here!!! upshot of it was that i was ready to go about an hour before these two were done with their dresses n makeup! the three of us got to the party a whole hour later than the time we had set for ourselves.. :) but the party was on all night and it was FUN! old friends who  hadn't met in a loooong time and a lovely bonfire on the roof... yay.... and a nice gossip session once everyone else had left and it was just four girls with alcohol in them talking :)

anyway.. then i went to help abby with her photoshoot the next morning... my sister.. teh professional photographr... and she paid me for acting as her production assistant!!! it was quite a family production actually.. pico jiji's script, abby the photographer and with vrin n me playing assistants to abby.. :) the other ppl there were like.. should we call this shoot the "mathur production" :D
the studio was in this little galli in lado sarai and almost everyone got lost trying to find the way there :) half the morning was spent giving directions on teh phone and running out to the main road to receive people.. by teh end of it my legs felt like they'll fall off coz i was still wearing the high heeled boots i wore for the party

and an entertaining day it was... the models who showed up were quite a bunch... there was a girl who happened to be an LLM student at MY college.. there was this guy who had to play a roadside romeo and quite looked the part, complete with faded jeans n a wierd shirt and sparkly belt before the shot began.. we gave him a much more sober shirt n told him to lose the belt...
and there was this reallllllly cute kid.. about 4 n a half years old.. who played and ran around for hours!! by the  time his turn for the shot came.. he was tired and refused to smile for the camera.. so i stood behind abby and made faces at him to make him laugh.. but he was soooo adorable.. he even scrambled up on top of the dining table being used in the  shot.. he was supposed to steal chocolates from it so he happily clambered up while he was supposed to pretend that  he was reaching for the jar.. and then just coz we all clapped for him.. he did the whole thing over again..

and speaking of adorable.. there was the cutest little puppy on the set.. he was the studio owner's pet and we played with him all day... he's a tiny little pug named Jumbo..and he wore a cute little red coat with paw prints on it!! he kept running onto the set.. he even started running after the kid.. who thought the pup was gonna bite him and got freaked out.. i have sooo many pictures of the dog.. and the set.. wish i could put them up... vrin n i almost had a fight over who would hold the dog.. by the end of it the studio owner was like.. why dont you guys just take him with you.. i'll get another dog..

the highlight of the day however was that towards the end of the day abby and the client's rep decided that they needed another couple of younger models. and vrin and I got to play models!!!!! got makeup done and posed and preened... and managed to actually get a couple of really pretty pictures!!
so what started as a day for us to lug stuff around, manage ppl and serve food, ended with my MY FIRST SHOOT!!! and abby's now promised to shoot my portfolio coz she has to add a fashion shoot to her own portfolio!!!
YAY!

Monday, December 14, 2009

welllll... this one's a bit shallow...

just saw new moon at plaza... it was quite an experience.. a hallful of women hooting at edward and jacob.... robert pattinson and taylor lautner actualy.. they're HOT!!!!! it was catcalls, screams and drool enough to drown the whole place.. they're stunning...

and then we got into this conversation about how if someone had a good body they'd look good even with a not so good looking face... coz noorie thinks that taylor lautner doesnt have such a goodlooking face.. I on the other hand think that robert pattinson is downright weird looking from most angles.. though i'd have to concede that he has the face of an angel if seen full face.. he looks weird at angles and in profile.. though taylor is WOW from every angle...

well.. the point is.. a question...
would someone look good if they had a not so good looking face and an amazing body??? or does the whole package count??????

maybe i'm biased towards taylor.. he's Jacob.. he's pretty much EXACTLY how i pictured jake.. and i ADORE jacob.. he's like the ideal guy... but would anyone else agree with my opinion???

my opinion.... its not just the face.. its teh whole thing.. the face, teh body (and OMG what a body ;) ) AND the person... teh reason i love jake n not edward is coz he's a real friend.. he's a supernatural being and yet he's not afraid to show his weakness... and he's always there for bella.. he doesnt try to control her or push her teh way edward does.. he accepts HER and is brave enough to put his own self on teh line.. unlike edward who just tries to 'protect' bella instead of letting her be herself...
 i remember this sentence from Eclipse... jacob asks bella if she wanted to have fun with him... and then he says.. "let me guess. youre not allowed to have fun are you?"

but... i digress...
so... coming back to teh point..

who'se better looking???? Jacob or Edward????
or to give the boys some credit... Taylor Lautner or Robert Pattinson???

Saturday, December 12, 2009

may angels lead you there

"you know you're gonna have to let go of his memories annie.. he's been gone for a long time now.." her sad smile had taken a turn towards pity by the time she got to the end of her sentence..

i knew she meant well... intellectually.. i KNEW he was gone... i had seen him collapse on that crowded road.. prayed fervently through the mad dash across the city... heard the words that made it final.. and yet.. i still waited for his return.. our room was the same as he had liked it.. his shirts still hung neatly in the cupboard.. i still looked up at the sound of a bike pulling up.. still searched for his face in a crowd... and lived with the hope of a miracle...

"don't cry annie.. i know how much you loved him.. how much you wish that day never happened.. but it did sweetheart.. you have to let go sometime.." i just looked away from her.. refusing to listen..

she have me a hug and walked out of the house.. i sank back down onto the bed and held on to the pillow that somehow still bore the scent of his skin.. stared at our picture on the wall as the light slowly faded from the window...

and woke to the feel of his arms around my body.. his breath on my hair.. his lips on my skin...
"hi..." i smiled at him.. "what took you so long..??"
"just.. got lost in the dark"