Sunday, April 30, 2006

another poem by sreyashi....

MEMORY OF LOVE........
I don't know why I thought of u again after so many days,
Its bin long since we both went different ways..
We had never really bin close since the start…
Yet for reasons I could'nt fathom then,
U had always held a special place in my heart…
And therein my feelings lay buried. As I had chosen to do…
Coz I could never muster up courage to express them to you…
Yet those emotions that I had felt for u…
Were the closest I had ever come to fallin in love…
Sumthing, I believed, never happened without,
The nod of approval from sumone above…
Yes, it probably was destiny, or god's will that brought us together,
Although I wish we had remained so forever…
I do not really have a grudge, coz whatever happened,
Or did not happen, whas perhaps meant to be..
And u may have bever realized, but the little time,
I had spent with u, made a world of difference to me…
The child in me grew up to be a girl,
And u kindled a part of my soul, that,
I myself was unfamiliar with, and set it free..
To fly beyond the horizon, into a world
Where boundless happiness waited only for me…

Now u are gone , n I don't know if I'll ever meet u again..
But u have left behind innumerable memories…
of joy..and… maybe a lil pain.
Yes, all those moments, I treasure with great care.
When I waited eagerly to catch a glimpse of u,
Early in the morning,
And the sheer joy and ecstasy of the moment
When I first talked to u…
And I remember, bein in a trance, after that, all day thru..
When a smile from u, or a word of appreciation,
Wud make me feel, as if I were in heaven,
When quite foolishly, every song or poem,
That earlier held not much meanin,
Reminded me of u, whenever I heard them..

And, of course, how do I forget that day,
Which, I knew, was the last one, I was spending with u.
I tried desparately to hold on to time,
But those minutes slipped away slowly…
And the day only left me with an image, that I cud forget never,
The final glimpse that I had caught of u,
That will be etched in my mind forever…
And I stood there alone, oblivious of the milling crowd around me,
With only a feelin of emptiness, knowin that,
It wud be the last of u, I'll ever see…

As I found myself, surrounded by ur thoughts, from all sides,
I realized that memories had a strange way of comin alive,
Try as I may, never to look behind at them,
I'll still encounter them, unexpectedly, and all of a sudden…
In those moments when I walked in thru those bylanes of memories,
In them I experienced nostalgia and solace,
And, when the journey ended, I walked back into the real world.Wiping off a tear that rolled down my face…

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

FAITH


Reading a book can really take u to different worlds….and make u examine ur own heart n mind and soul and faith… n really think about what it all means ….
Ive been reading books that have really forced me to try n figure out what this means to me- soul, faith, god, life, time, love…….. it began really with a bunch of books by Richard Bach that I read… Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, One, bridge across forever…. N then I stumbled upon Paolo Coelho- the alchemist, eleven minutes….. then came the DaVinci Code and Angels & Demons by Dan brown…. N now I’m reading this book by Orhan Pamuk.. Called Snow…

Life, faith, religion, god, love, hope, despair…. What is it really???? What is it that pours into every corner of my heart but try as I may, I cant ever even begin to explain…
God n religion….. Self and soul… does belief in god really need belief in religion??? No… but then what name do u give ur god??? How do u pray???
I’m most comfortable when in my own heart I pray for something… it feels best when I’m not asking god for help but plain courage to help me face all odds…. But then to go to a temple… or chapel n feel that other people are praying with the same faith as you.. gives me a sense of hope… of strength in my own faith… in myself, in the people around me… in god…

I was talking to Ankit bout this…. Bout life n faith n how religion n faith n ur outlook towards life influence u at the oddest moments…he said that he Didn’t quite know if god existed but he believed in his existence.. in the existence of a natural order of things.. he mentioned that whenever he is agitated or worried or restless n can’t sleep.. He chants a mantra…. a prayer a simple prayer bout giving respect to life.. among other things…… and that calms him down… I do that too… chant a simple prayer over and over again… n that soothes me.. makes my mind still enough to focus on what I am doing or have to do…
N then I thought bout what we discussed in Sanskrit class.. While analyzing the 12th chapter of the Bhagavad-Gita… it says that there is no one way of worship… god loves all his devotees alike… even atheists, who believe in doing their duty and in compassion towards all..

I went to a temple after a looooooong time… last I went to a temple was last year.. right after I got my 12th board results.. I went to Tirupati with my family.... I dropped in to the college chapel once in a while…I’ve somehow always believed in solitary prayer… a personal god.. god that pervades everything, every living or nonliving soul… what connects everything to each other…. Like the story of Gaia.. the planet Gaia in the Foundation novels by Isaac Asimov… Gaia… where the planet itself has a soul that’s connected to every being on the planet… it is one… n that’s my idea of God…

To quote Vittoria Vetra in Angels & Demons..: “Science tells me, God must exist, my mind tells me I will never understand God…… And my heart tells me I am not meant to….”

Thursday, April 20, 2006

CURTAINS.......


the most awful thing bout dating sum1 who'se a yr senior- the fact that he'll graduate n go away a whole year b4 u do....we've been together almost 6 months now.... n we do have a whole year to go before he graduates... but there is a shadow on the horizon.... n hence this poem...

THE END.....

Far away still.. but almost visible
like a mirage in the distance..
a flickering image
dancing just beyond the horizon.

a lump forms in my throat..
rising, in apprehnesion
or almost certainty

i clutch at your hand
knowing what awaits...
or not quite sure
of what lies ahead.

The future changes with every step
every choice opens a new set of doors
every day ends with a different night

and it is the beginning still......

the intro music pauses, quivering at the vision...
of the future to come...
Curtains.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

HOPE

There is some hope here
not all can be lost forever..
not all can be dead
Hope springs eternal....

From mists of fear and darkness
a tiny point of light...
something always survives..
hope springs eternal.

everything just the same..
just lonliness and pain..
then a bubble of laughter rises
and hope... springs eternal

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

a poem

This is a poem my friend sreyashi wrote....... its reallllly good so i wanted to put it up so that ppl could read


I AM WAITING FOR YOU!

Standing at the window side,I gazed at the moonlit sky,A slow breeze blew along,Caressing my face as it passed on.My heart danced with joy,and was filled with an inexplicable delight.My thoughts carried me far away,Far away from the real world.And then i thought about you,I wondered if it is really true,that someone, somewhere is made for you.then why have not i met you yet,But, it's true, that in my dreams i have created,Someone who might be like you,Someone whom i am so eagerly waiting to meet,Who would carry this dreamy teenager off her feet,Someone who would accept me as the way I am,and to my life who would add a new meaning.It's true that i have never met you before,But often I have felt your presence near me.In the early dawn,when the first rays of the sun, brightens up the sky,when the first song of the koel,sitting in the vicinity,so beautifully breaks Nature's serenity,my heart, with delight, soars high,and i can feel you close by!When i dance in the rain,and feel the sprinkle of rain drops on my face,and when the winds whistle past my ear,i cannot help feeling, that you were here.When i walk down the lane, in the evening,and faraway at the horizon,i see the sun setting,when the moon starts peeping,from behing the faint reddish glow of the sky,i find your thoughts encircling,me, from all sides,making me, oblivious of my surroundings.Often i have tried searching for you around me,and felt, i had found you in somebody,Was it truly you , i wonder,or is it because, i feel so strongly for you,that my emotions have overwhelmed me............A sudden gust of cool breeze,pulled me back from my thoughts,i hugged myself tightly,and smiled softly at the stars,Till, someone above, feels,that we are destined to meet,I will wait for you , i certainly will.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

waiting for something.............


for something to happen.. with bated breath.. don't know what im waiting for.... but waiting just the same...
a smile... a look... a passing glance... a song.. a dream..
whatever it may mean..
a thought, a vision..
excitement... a frission..
atremble with hope..
of what?? dont know.....